Facebook War: What to Do When You Get Your Ass Handed to You on Facebook.

Have you ever been in a Facebook war? I’ve shared my experience so you can know what to do when you get your ass handed to you on Facebook.

Eight days ago, I posted one or two sentences and hit publish. I did not contemplate it, I wasn’t aware it was an extremely controversial topic, and I was passionate about my stance and naively assumed many moms would be as well. I posted on my main page and a neighborhood moms page.

Four days after my original post, I was still receiving feedback. The comments were divided nearly in half from those that agreed and supported my feelings and half that severely did not support it. I felt it was my responsibility to reply and engage with everyone because I opened the door for discussion so I did and I did it respectfully and appreciatively.

The problem was, it was not a real discussion. It became a cyber war of who is right and who is wrong and I was the main target. It consumed hours of multiple days and I noticed I was becoming internally defensive and stressed as I tried to explain myself clearly, but you can’t through a tiny little post. I learned a few valuable lessons from this experience and thought I would share it with you so you may avoid a Facebook war.

1. Facebook war is a real term: Urban dictionary describes it as the partaking or observing a heated cyber argument on someone’s facebook wall. Usually results in one of the parties involved getting their ass beat at a party by the other people involved.
2. Do not use Facebook to discuss important topics unless it is a specified group you have created and everyone in it is there to reach an understanding or if it is a cause you regularly work hard toward and for.
3. Realize, a random post on your Facebook wall is just not an effective means of communication.
4. Understand, many people will misinterpret, twist, and/or hide behind a post rather than pick up a phone and call you. You will be surprised by who does and potentially hurt by it.
5. Do not arbitrarily post on any form of social media without knowing the topics current station (is it controversial or not).
6. If you do post something on Facebook that will provoke mass commentary; respond, be courteous, and be gone. Do not let it consume you for hours and days.
7. Lastly, remember that good friends are different from Facebook friends. Be reasonable about what to expect form a Facebook friend and expect that a good friend will have a real discussion with you and it won’t be through Facebook.

I have deactivated my Facebook but you can still reach me through my website, email, Instagram, and many of you have my cell. I hope this resonates with you especially if you’ve been on either side of a Facebook war. It’s sad, ineffective, and a very poor means to understand a real friends perspective. Social media is a form of communication but not always the best. I’ve learned my lesson and I think I can walk again. Ha!