To all the stay at home moms (SAHM), I use to envy you but now I envy the high heels that use to move mountains. I spent all of my adult life working. All I knew was work. All I knew was to juggle the demands of work and home life. I worked at various commands in different career fields and always, always there was at least one man who had a wife that was a stay at home mom (SAHM) and here is what I thought:
What I thought about the SAHM:
- She’s lucky
- She’s lazy
- Must be nice
- How boring
- I could never do that
- What if something happened to her husband, what would she do to support herself
- How great that he gets to only focus on work because his wife does EVERYTHING else
- She is so smart, why didn’t I think of that
- I would never give up my career
- She has the most amazing life; yoga, dinner in the crockpot, cleaning to joyful music, and a happy, happy home
Are you dying yet? I am! In reality, here is what she’s thinking:
The Truth about the SAHM:
- I am so lonely
- This sucks
- I miss looking pretty
- I love wearing yoga pants all day
- Please don’t wake up, I just want to drink one cup of coffee first
- I love my life
- Sweeping and mopping, why did I go to college?
- I’m so lucky to be at home with her
- Why is he working so late? (it’s only 5:30)
- Daddy finger, daddy finger, where are you (mom’s can you relate?)
- If she say’s mommy one more time
- Why am I crying
- I have to go back to work and put my education to use
- I don’t want to go back to work
- I need joy
- I need coffee and wine and more coffee
- Okay, I have everything I need
The Shit is Hard No Matter Where the Mom Works, however…
The mind shifts from time to time. It was one of the hardest transitions of my life leaving the workforce to stay at home with my sweet girl. And, let’s be honest, they’re never ALWAYS sweet. The day’s are so, so long. I’d be crazy to nap when she did because that is my only time to ummm, shower? Or- watch a show, take a break, or how about those chores?!
What a Complainer
Some of you may be reading this thinking, “what a complainer” and the truth is yes, I’ve done plenty of that. As a matter of fact, I’m quite sure I dealt with depression at a serious level. Learning who I was, learning who this little girl was, and learning to be a wife all over again just didn’t come easy.
Now she is four and in pre-school and I can’t help but to wonder…
Why on earth was working full time, standing duty, maintaining an awesome workout regimen, and handling ALL the home responsibilities on top of raising my daughter… oh and, attending college part time easier than THIS?
I think staying at home with my babe is much more difficult than working. Hands down! But the reward is very personal. At first it feels like empty and thankless servitude than God reminds us that such a time is this.
*Moms’, you’re doing a great job. You are the most important person to that child, and you are right where you’re suppose to be, wherever that is.